How long will it take before we actually believe what the Book of Wisdom tells us on the 13th Sunday in Ordinary Time? God did not make death. As often as we or others try to blame death on God, it isn’t His creation.
We must face reality, though, and acknowledge that death is a part of our existence. Along with that comes pestilence, suffering and pain. If God did not create all of these things, what is God’s relationship with us as creatures who have to deal with them? Does God have power over death? What is to be our relationship with suffering and death?
Since God is with us in all things, He wishes to be our companion in the midst of death and a source of peace and healing.
We thank God every day for the progress that has been made in the medical sciences and how much they offer through relief from suffering, extension of our lives and healing from sickness. In the end, we all have to embrace death at some point. Who is God in the midst of that embrace?
We can see from Jesus’ life that God does not back away from suffering and death. We can see that Jesus does not attach the taboo or the isolation that many cultures attached to death. Jesus touches the bodies of those who have died. Jesus Himself dies and spends time in the tomb. He stands in the midst of suffering, refuses to be repelled by it and invites us to have hope even in the midst of our dying. We also witnessed Jesus weeping at the death of His friend and having compassion as widows face the death of their children. These are all very specific examples of who God wants to be for us in our suffering and at the time of our death.
To experience the full companionship of Jesus in our journey with suffering and death, we need to make sure that we are not taking the position of a victim. It is a sobering thought to believe that everyone suffers and dies. My suffering and death does not make me somebody special. The pain that I encounter makes me one with all other human beings. Instead of separating us, it ought to connect us more deeply to one another. Any suffering that we embrace in a healthy way leads to the virtue of compassion, understanding those who suffer along with us.
The sacrament of the anointing of the sick and dying reminds us that we are not to suffer in darkness, in isolation or in rejection. We are meant to suffer in community and with community. We are not meant to wait until the very last breath of our lives before we ask for the help of the community and the blessing of God in the midst of our suffering.
Make sure that those around you know that you are suffering in some way. If you find yourself whining and complaining, you probably are not in right relationship with Jesus at this point. We don’t have to beg for companionship in the midst of suffering, we simply have to invite others into it with us. It helps if we don’t wait until the last minute to be part of the community. It helps if we have prayed with others in their suffering before we expect others to pray with us in our suffering.
From the cross of our suffering, let us imitate Jesus. From that cross, we are not meant to hold grudges, and we are certainly meant to forgive others who have harmed us. May the cross of our suffering be a throne of glory as it was for Jesus.
Father Donald Wester is pastor of All Saints Parish in St. Peters.